Newsflash: Hillary is Dead
No, not Hillary Clinton, Sir Edmund Hillary, the first (along with Tenzing Norgay) man to climb to the top of Mount Everest.
We are as yet unable to confirm reports that Sean Hannity became engorged and tried to couple with a distraught and terrified Alan Colmes when he heard report that “Hillary is Dead.”
In order to assist those who have difficulty distinguishing between Hillary and Hillary, we offer the following.
Comparison: Hillary Clinton to Sir Edmund Hillary
Famous for:
Sir Edmund — being the first to climb Mount Everest
Ms. Clinton — being married to the first President impeached for a blowjob
Subsequent use of fame:
Sir Edmund — used fame garnered by being first to climb Everest to create trust to benefit native Nepalese Sherpas to the tune of 27 schools, two hospitals and 13 village health clinics, plus bridges, drinking-water systems and scholarships.
Ms. Clinton — used fame garnered by being married to Presidential fellatio recipient to successfully run for Senator, raise a shitload of money to support her own political candidacies, then launch a viable Presidential campaign.
Current Status:
Sir Edmund — Deceased, but still famous
Ms. Clinton — Alive, and running for President
